Club News

Je Suis Charlie

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As you might be aware, a horrendous terrorist attack in Paris resulted in the murder of 12 journalists, policemen and civilians.

French people all over the world are lighting a candle. This is Pauline's.

 

Furriners come over here, takin' our archery badges ...

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Congratulations to Pauline who was shooting at Bannockburn's Double Portsmouth on Sunday 4th January.

She just missed out on the medals but did bag herself a Bannockburn Blue Spider and collected the spot prize for best gold in the face of stiff competition from chocolate starved archers.

We're pretty sure Geo was there as well ... so Pauline's performance was even more impressive given the whynging distractions!

   

They Want to Eat Your Brains ...

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Some of us took up archery for fun, some to compete, some to follow a historical interest ... but some took up archery for the day the ZOMBIE APOCALYPSE arrives!

   

Fun Night Slaughter

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The following should be read in a Raymond Chandler style voice over.....

It was 7:31pm on a wet and windy Wednesday when I got the call. A 10-71 with a side order of 10-54 ... a shooting and a possible dead body

I put away my crochet and switched off Downton abbey - It was slow evening at the station - and headed out.

On arrival at the scene, a so called archery fun night was in progress. Some very shady looking characters dressed similarly, all carrying antiquated projectile weapons ... some form of weapon worshipping cult? I called for backup, a paddy wagon and a historian.

The semi naked victim had been tied to a foam bale and then shot in the face. It wasnt pretty.

It only took a few days for us to arrest the miscreant.  Detailed examination by Ballistics identified the projectile as 'an arrow', a common enough item .. IN THE 15th CENTURY but even so difficult to trace. However we find no matter how cunning, the criminal mind always makes a mistake. The error on this occasion was egotistically to label the arrow with letters 'MM' suspected by Psych Evaluation to be the perp's initials. In addition given the feather colours, a fixation with red and therefore blood was also suspected. Possibly this slaying was part of a number of killings as this was arrow '9' hinting at 8 previous victims! Could this be mob related, a serial killer or just a nutjob? ... that was for a jury to decide. My job was just to catch him.

In the end 'MM' was easy to trace. Pulling the archery clubs records there was only one member with the initials MM. We dawn raided his den of iniquity discovering identical projectiles numbering 1-4, 6, 8, 11 and 12. There were component parts, facilities to manufacture more as well as numerous sick publications on 'form', 'tuning' and maintenance!

During interrogation it all came out ... decades of involvement with 'archery'.  The slow slide into madness ... entrapment as a teen, years of solitary practice, foreign rendezvous' with like minded weirdos, club chairmanship, coaching (I dont even want to think about what goes on here) and a stint at SAA chairmanship which proved so intoxicating that even after a period of cold turkey rehab, he backslid and was doing it again. 25 to life in the big house seems too short a time for this man's crimes!

What darkness lurks in the hearts of apparent honest citizens? Pretty damn dark it seems where this so called 'innocent pastime' of archery is concerned. So beware any feelings you have for 'archery' (medical term Toxophilia - heck it even sounds nasty!) or law enforcements finest could be paying you a professional visit.

   

Kyudo

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Japanese Archery or Kyodo is less like the archery we know and more like a cross between Zen and yoga while holding a bow.

This YouTube video gives lots of interesting details on how different it really is.

   

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